Illusion of Control
"Please don't go for a walk," my husband said as I laced up my sneakers.
"I've been cooped up in this house all day and need to get out for a few minutes before it gets dark out. I'll be fine," I responded.
When I stepped outside and looked up at the darkening clouds, I lost a bit of my confidence. The threatening weather could not deter me from my mission, though. Besides, I always went for a walk on Tuesday nights.
I set out to power through my neighborhood when I started to feel the building electricity in the air along with the eerie stillness that proceeds a massive lightning strike. I picked up my pace. I attempted to steer clear of tall trees and overhead power lines, but quickly became aware of features of my neighborhood I had never noticed before. My neighborhood is filled with nothing but tall, imposing trees and power lines criss-crossing in every direction overhead.
The panic began to rise out of the depths of my belly. I have seen the effects of a direct lightning strike on a young man--a hole in his cheek the size of a quarter which the bolt had passed through. I had no desire to experience that for myself. Even with a bum foot, I sprinted home faster than I ever thought possible. My husband was waiting at the front door, eyes to the sky and worry etched on his face. He was relieved to see me alive and I was relieved to enter the relative safety of our home.
We don't mince words in our house. After a big hug, he said, "That was dumb. Please don't ever do that again."
It was absolutely the truth so I didn't begrudge the comment. I had foolishly forged ahead with my plan because . . . well . . . it was on the schedule. I'll admit it--pretty dumb. I was allowing my schedule to be my master.
According to scholars, the Law of Moses consists of 613 commandments. Can you imagine the weight of following all of those rules? I can't . . . nor do I want to. Romans 6:14 says, "Sin is no longer your master, for you no longer live under the requirements of the law. Instead, you live under the freedom of God’s grace."
If I now live under the "freedom of God's grace," why do I subject myself to so many rules? I'm convinced we just like rules. In and of themselves, rules are not a bad thing, but when we allow them to control our thoughts and our actions, they become dangerous.
Ultimately our list of rules we live by (and expect others to live by) comes down to one thing: control. We are called to surrender to God and receive His grace. Instead, we create rules so we can be the ones in charge, not just of ourselves but others as well. We use the illusion of control to attempt to fix ourselves and others. Control stems from pride. Submission to God is the opposite of control; it's humility.
"Sin is no longer your master." We can choose to continue in our sin of pride by attempting to control our own lives as well as the lives of those around us or we can choose to surrender our illusion of control to our Lord and Savior and live under the freedom that only comes from His grace.
